He’s Gone

In 1957 a Rock& Roll group named the Chantels had a hit called He’s Gone. Part of the lyrics are below:
“He’s gone (he’s gone)
I don’t know where
But he’s gone (he’s gone)
I must have done something wrong
He is gone (he’s gone)

I’m sorry (he’s gone)
For what I’ve done
To make you leave me…”

To hear the song, click He’s Gone.

Yesterday was Easter Sunday. Marge and I decided to go down to Lake Ontario. There is a beautiful wheelchair accessible trail not far from our home. It was sunny and around 640. Lake Ontario is quite large and the vista is similar to being at the ocean. It always reminds me of how insignificant we are in the grand scheme of things and I love that. As I sat there looking out over the vastness of the water I had a strong reminder that he was gone. He’d been gone for some time, but the memory still engulfed me. Strangely enough, I can’t remember him anymore. I guess it’s a way to protect myself. In the beginning I missed him all the time and was very bitter he had left me. For years I had very vivid dreams of what it was like when he was around, but that has changed too. Like the song says, I’m sorry for what I’ve done to make you leave me, but I know it was nothing that I did that made him leave.

I realized yesterday he really had gone and that I can’t remember him anymore, his walking, jogging or spontaneous lifestyle, etcetera. As the Chantels’ sing “I don’t know where, but he’s gone” and don’t really care anymore. My life is very different without him and that’s okay. However, I now truly believe and that’s very reassuring that he left for a reason.

He's Gone

He’s Gone


He's Here

He’s Here

11 responses to “He’s Gone

  1. Great blog, I love your perspective on things.

  2. Loved him and love you.

  3. From my perspective, I bet Marge remembers him and misses him too.

  4. Reblogged this on zuzusays and commented:
    Every one of us who has to live with a major physical or mental change understands this. It’s so hard to let go…

  5. Every one of us who has to live with a major physical or mental change understands this. It’s hard to let go, but when you realize he’s gone you can go on in more peace.

  6. Rich , I know you have inspired me, and so many others. Sometimes your blog just helps me clarify my own thoughts, and reflect. Thank you for that! I hope to be able to see you and Marge this summer.
    Kathy Hannon ( the non Denny sister)

  7. This is awesome Rich. Thanks for the perspective. Love you man!

  8. You are a remarkable person Rich Fabend, you amaze me with your perspective on life. Thanks for sharing this with us. Love you loads!

  9. Beautifully said Rich…you are such a strong person to look forward instead of back! Beautiful picture of you and Marge!

  10. Im crying, still trying to accept the new me. I miss my bike ALOT! You are an inspiration to me💛 Thank you!

  11. He may be gone but he left his smile, his sense of humor, his strength, his love of life and most importantly, his ability to love unconditionally those of us who need it the most… I LOVE YOU, maybe even a little bit more than him, because of the other life lessons I needed to learn…
    XOXO
    Geralyn

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